Hello December

A year ago today, I took off in a plane departing from a place I was not ready to leave. As the planes engines fired and the slow stroll down the runway turned into the lumbering pace that lifted us off the ground, I glimpsed the Costa Rican landscape for the last time, not knowing if I'd every see it again, and could not hold back my tears. This place represented an escape I desperately needed from my normal surroundings in which a pattern of self-sacrifice and personal isolation had taken a toll on my spirit. Everything in my life was so serious that I didn't remember what it meant to laugh or feel joy. Joy found me again there, thanks to some remarkable classmates and professors and the national mantra: pura vida. However, leaving as abruptly as circumstances required me to made it difficult for me to believe that that joy would come home with me. A year later, I marvel at how much I have been through and how my three months abroad remain so close to my heart. I have fought for that joy in the face of the trials that have riddled the last twelve months, and it has been worth the fight. I feel more resilient, as if I have recognized the importance of joy and laughter because I lost them at one time. All that I have been through in the last year, although not always fun, has burnished my character in a positive way. PTL.

Mother Teresa, Full of Wisdom

Currently, my leisure reading is composed, in part, by this book I'd Rather Teach Peace. A good friend lent it to me. By his writing style, I can tell that the author is one of those teachers that students don't ever forget. Someone who engages his students, encourages them to speak their minds and think critically about issues. He wants the material he teaches to become part of his student's identities; rote memorization and mindless regurgitation, despite its prevalence in our education system, does not constitute true learning. I couldn't agree more. I have experienced this myself in my own education. Learning is most fun and most meaningful when I can dive head first into the material, think about it, chew on it and figure out how it ought to be integrated into my reality. The world needs more teachers like Colman McCarthy who puts his faith in the humanity of even the most closed off and misunderstood kids.

This book has called to my attention how much violence is emphasized as the preferred means of conflict resolution in our country, world, etc. High school history classes highlight the heroic acts of war heroes while often overlooking the peacemaking efforts of many. Truly, why don't we learn about people like Gandhi in school?

Included in the text is a poem written by Mother Teresa that I think is really cool. It's entitled Anyway

People are unreasonable, illogical and self-centered.
Love them anyway.
If you do good, people may accuse you of selfish motives.
Do good anyway.
If you are successful, you may win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.
The good you do may be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.
Honesty and openness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and open anyway.
What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.
People who really want help may attack you if you help them.
Help them anyway.
Give the world the best you have and you may get hurt.
Give the world your best anyway.

The meaning of autumn

September has come and passed. According to the celestial bodies, we entered into autumn several days ago. September was filled with weather that made me uneasy about the impending change in season that I haven't experienced in two years. Unusually large amounts of rain couple with unusually cold temperatures and the winds typical of West Central Minnesota made me think that I've lost my ability to adapt to cold weather (in ecology, this ability is termed phenotypic plasticity; we're being tested on this on Wednesday). I was beginning to think the only solution was to seek refuge in the tropics again.

However, today was a beautiful fall day. Our ecology class spent the day at Lake Carlos State Park near Alexandria, MN. We hiked through the forest, learned how to identify much of the vegetation and did an exercise in forest sampling. Many of our lab activities this semester have been dampened (literally) by inclement weather. Standing out on the prairie in blowing rain, trying keep your notebook dry while simultaneously taking notes inside a plastic bag, although laughable, is not all that enjoyable. We do it in the name of being hardcore, and feel justified in calling ourselves ecologists as a result.

But today, today fall colors were at their peak. The forest was illuminated from the outside in with that lustrous yellow that comes but once a year. The air was crisp and fresh, and an army of fifty ecologists traipsing through piles of fallen leaves created quite the symphony. Today's weather brought me back to the beauty of fall in Minnesota. There is joy in having a cold nose and a body warm from hiking in layers. There is opportunity for silence such that you can hear the leaves falling singly to the ground. A sack lunch eaten outside is always more satisfying than eating anything indoors. It is beautiful to feel the warmth of sun on your face even though the air around you is crisp.

you know you're in college when...

• a rainstorm blows through and all three of your roommates are as enthusiastic about puddle jumping as you are. it leads to tens minutes of the bunny hop through a forty foot puddle.

• killing flies in your apartment becomes a valued technique and turns into a competitive game.

• your refrigerator stops working. someone notices that the cheese is softer than normal and the frozen fruit is dripping all over the freezer. you report it to residential life, and when you come back to class, there's a new refrigerator. how did i know? all the food inside was not where we left it. i have a feeling that appliance repair will never be that easy again.

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in other news, i struck out on my back with my camera bag this afternoon. i wanted to take some pictures around some corn and soy fields around dinner time. i made the mistake of wearing shorts and a tank top with tennis shoes. the instant i hopped off my bike, i was assaulted (no exaggeration) by mosquitoes. i couldn't even focus the camera without feeling the urge to slap or swat. i rode home, put on pants, sleeves and some defunct bugspray, and embarked again on round two (with more success). i consider two scenarios in light of this encounter: (1) the farmers that tend those fields don't spray pesticides or (2) the farmers readily spray pesticides but the mosquitoes have developed resistance to the chemicals. in which case, morris is breeding a super-race of mosquitoes! watch out world!!!

i am taking to my latin america (one in literature and one in film) classes like a bee on pollen (shout out ecology lab!). learning from native speakers is so enjoyable. i love having spanish class everyday, and the content of each of the classes is very complementary. i'm going to learn a lot this semester!

Small Joys

The small joys present in this small town are numerous. Since moving into Apartment G4 on the UMM campus, I have experienced a glorious handful of these moments interspersed between others in which I stop and wonder, "hey, where'd all my friends go?"

Our apartment lays on the east end of the campus. Our bedroom windows face east, and once again, I have the privilege to witness sunrise every morning over the wind turbine. To add to the glory of it all, my desk is right next to the door that leads to our balcony/staircase/fire escape. We have been leaving the door open to facilitate cross-ventilation and also to enjoy the view. So, sitting at my desk, I turn to my left and see my roommate and turn to my right and have a great view of the prairie.

The only downside to the open-door policy on the balcony is that we have managed quite the collection of house flies. There are dozens in our apartment. The four of us had some (morbid?) fun swatting at them with rolled up newspaper. We killed several, but many remain. While working on an essay at my desk, I managed to kill four with my bare hands. I am proudly maintaining a housefly graveyard on my desk to serve as a warning for the ones who remain....

I get an hour plus (!) of Spanish everyday :) A teacher I had for my first ever Spanish class at UMM just returned to teach a course for a professor that's on sabbatical this semester. She remembered me from four years ago when I could hardly pronounce "Me llamo Andrea." We had a good conversation yesterday, and I am looking forward to her class and taking advantage of her office hours to practice speaking!

We went out to Pomme de Terre Park for our ecology lab this morning. Walking around with a field notebook reminded me of academic excursions in Costa Rica. This time around my surroundings are a little less tropical and a little more... prairie :) Margaret walked us around a place we all know too well - the only place in town with bike trails - and we entered a new world. The names of the plants, and the insects that pollinate them. There's so much to know and understand about the dynamics of the ecosystem, the relationships between flowers and their visitors. Everyone in the class was curious and asking questions. It was great. I even snagged myself a pair of good lab partners!

Our apartment is probably the homiest home away from home I ever lived in. One of my roommates brought vases with her for decoration, and we filled them with prairie plants from the park or rather "weed bouquets". They're beautiful :) We also have a couple of antique pieces of furniture that make the generic living room really comfortable. And photos on shelves and on the walls. I've had to adjust to sharing less space with more people again, but the company I have in this apartment is certainly worth the extra effort.

mañana me voy

i'm packing up my life again for the third time in less than four months. preparing for my last fall in morris. my last semester of spanish classes. and my first time living with three other people.

costa rica made me more heat-tolerant than i've ever been before, so although i always look forward to autumn, the imminence of winter also looms. i missed the changing leaves and the crisp air that comes in the fall months last year, so i am looking forward to being eased into winter instead of thrown into it. i have come to love the heat and tolerate the humidity of summer. i do not feel anxious for the summer to give way to fall, but i know its time.

i look forward to several things about morris: a life uncomplicated by commutes, motor vehicles and traffic; the ability to bike off into the sunset until my legs tire with only harvesting combines to accompany me; living independently again in a supportive and engaged community; having an hour plus of spanish built into every day of the week; exploring photography.

many more good things await me in morris than i ever thought could at this time a year ago. although i am reluctant to depart from the metropolitan area (after all, i have many dear friends settled here and nearly all my extended family), i am not dreading it. that is a blessing.

bring on the fifth year! i am super-senior!

365 days ago today

A year ago today, I left for my semester in Costa Rica.

bailando

I went out to dance for the first time in a very long time last night. So enjoyable. Especially with a good partner, who gives you space to move, is patient with your missteps and teaches you new things. Totally worth losing some sleep.

Reflections and Discoveries

Recently, I have discovered a new favorite band: Mumford & Sons. They're British with kind of a mellow alternative rock sound and some Celtic influences. I suppose you could compare them to Snow Patrol, but a little more upbeat. I also belt out Sara Bareilles' new song, "King of Anything" whenever I hear it in the car.

I have also discovered a website that has free PDF downloads available of the piano sheet music for a selection of popular songs. Instead of going to be at a reasonable time last night, I purged the entire site for songs that appealed to me. I have a pile of PDFs saved in a folder on my desktop that I plan to print once I get home.

This afternoon, I went to the DMU library to kill some time between work and dinner with the girls from work (thanks for the tacos, Rachel!). I had planned on just sitting and reading my book for a while and enjoying the natural light that comes through the walls of glass windows. On my way to find a seat, I stumbled across DMU's collection of books on disease ecology and infectious diseases. I nerded out and checked out two books and plan to spend some time with them tonight. They're super relevant to what I hope to do after graduation next year - too bad I didn't find this treasure chest 8 weeks ago!

My last day at DMU is tomorrow. I'm sad to say goodbye to the people and the place, because it feels more definite this time around. There isn't the cushion of 'oh, maybe I'll be back next summer.' This summer has been quite different than last, but just as good, nonetheless. I am thankful for all I have experienced here and all I have learned. My experiences in Des Moines have been very formative in the grand scheme of the last two years. What I have learned here will serve me well in the experiences that await me.

Football

I went on a long bike ride this evening. It was highly satisfying because most of my attempts at long bike rides in the past several weeks have been foiled by flooded trails. I made it all the way to the Birdland marina before I encountered an impassable trail. I elected to press forward on non-flooded roads through a less wholesome part of town instead of doubling back and likely arriving home after dark. Passers by gauked at me from their cars, including a couple of unwelcome cat calls. However, my jaunt through the east side had a particular perk.

I ended up at a familiar intersection where there is a junior high school with an open field with goal posts on either end for playing soccer. When I drive by this spot on my way to the east side clinic in the mornings, there is never anyone there, but I've always wondered if the neighbors ever organized soccer games there. I found out tonight that they do. When I biked by, there were at least 30 Latinos crowded into the relatively small field engaged in a game of soccer. If there had been fewer people on the field (the game was clearly already crowded with a few sitting on the sidelines), if there had been other females present or playing, and if I wasn't on my bike as the sun was getting lower in the sky, I may have thought about stopping to jump in on the game.

There is a group that I know of that plays pick up soccer in Minneapolis. Maybe I'll have to join them once or twice when I'm home in August. My love for soccer never dies. Summer nights like this one, seeing youth clad in pinnies, kicking a ball around a goal never fails to stir up nostalgia for the sport that captured my heart at a young age and still has yet to let go even though injury has taken me off the competitive field. I learned last fall that though I am not able to play soccer on the two hours a day six days a week scale that was typical in high school and my first years of college, that doesn't mean that the joy of playing will completely evacuate my life. Playing on the beach in Samara and at the OTS stations last fall were highlights of my time abroad. I may not be as fit as I once was, but I can hold my own in most company, and playing soccer can still highlight my life in small doses. It almost becomes more special that way.

The least of these

Two opportunities to be kind to strangers have fallen into my lap in the past two days. These opportunities were opportune in the sense that the service at Trinity on Sunday included scripture and preaching on one of my favorite Bible passages in Matthew 25:

For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me... I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.

Whenever I hear this passage, I often wonder to myself if I'm missing the boat. Are there people sitting under my nose with blatantly obvious needs that I have the means to meet? Sometimes I think I am too engrossed in my own selfish indulgence to even take note of the needs of people around me. But the Lord made it very clear and very obvious how I could show two individuals kindness.

As I was leaving the clinic yesterday, one of the patients (who had been done with her appointment and sitting in the waiting room for upwards of an hour) was on the corner waiting for the Paratransit (the on-call public transportation) to pick her up. It was the end of the day, and I got in my car to drive home. I had the window down as I was pulling out of the parking lot, and this patient hollered at me asking for a ride. She had been waiting for her ride for two and a half hours and her destination was on my way home. My sacrifice to lighten her burden was minimal, but I'm glad she hollered at me because I probably would not have stuck my nose out to help her otherwise. Perhaps in the future I will.

And today, I was helping translate for families at a Back-to-School Health Fair sponsored in part by Trinity. Translation duties were minimal, but I wanted to be available if the need arose so I pulled out a bracelet-in-progress from my pocket and safety-pinned it to my pant leg. I finished by the time things in the make-shift clinic were wrapping up, and I was adding finishing touches as a little boy approached me, very curious about what I was doing. He asked me what it was and how I was making it. He thought it was pretty cool, and I asked him if he wanted it. His immediate answer was yes. I got it all finished, tied it on his wrist and he ran off.

Kids have really grown on me this summer. They seem less intimidating than they did last summer. I think, simply by exposure to lots of kids in the clinics, I have observed them enough to feel more at ease communicating and relating to them. It's neat.

One last matter on my mind today is that of choosing public health programs. I have a list of schools that I plan on applying to this fall. That's all well and good, but beyond simply choosing a school, one must elect a department and a degree program as well. At two schools, I am torn between epidemiology and environmental health. Epidemiology offers skills that are valuable across all sub-fields in public health, but some of the courses in the environmental programs sound so fascinating... right up my alley. Then there's a school like Tulane, which has more departments that tickle my fancy than not: epidemiology, environmental science, international health and development, or tropical medicine (read: parasitology!). How do I begin to distinguish such programs? Do I make the decision based on how valuable and marketable the skills garnered in a given program will be? (In that case, epidemiology) Or based on how interesting the classes sound? (In this case, international health and development or tropical medicine) I don't want to arrive at the end of my two years and wish I had taken different classes. Or do I base my decision on which faculty interests interest me most? (In that case, tropical medicine) There are lots of factors to consider and they all seem to measure on different scales. I'm not really sure how to go about it. Can't I just do everything and be in school indefinitely and not accumulate any debt? Yeah, right.

Inadvertent Connection

I stopped by Culver's on the way home from Spanish table tonight. I had a hankering for some custard, and decided to indulge. I pulled up to the drive through window and the guy working handed me my ice cream cone, made eye contact and I couldn't tell if he was trying to be friendly or if he was though something about me was funny. I glanced at his nametag: Jorge. Then, as I was pulling out of the drive-thru, I realized I was jamming to merengue in the car and he was probably amused by my music selection.

Small Sounds and Distractions

Last night I relished in the novelty of going to the movie theater alone. It sounds like a hopelessly lonely activity, but it allowed me to jump more fully into the world of the film that I was watching. I had no company at my side to reel me back in if I happened to take my eyes from the screen. I went to the only theater in Des Moines that plays exclusively independent and foreign films. The movie was about a murder investigation in 1970s Argentina. The images of a colonial society run-down by the sub-tropical climate were amplified by the characteristic rattle of the old film projector I could hear above my head.

It has been a rainy fourth of July holiday. I woke up to rain, and it has scarcely cleared since. Lucky for me, I didn't have any thrilling plans for celebrating our nation's independence today, aside from getting a complete draft of my biocomm paper sent off (finally) to my adviser in Morris. Instead, I sit at the kitchen table, prompted by the soft patter of rain to do my work and not get distracted by other tasks, activities or opportunities.

...and here I sit with a computer at my fingertips, and a whole world of distractions contained within. Sometimes I feel I would be better off (more productive and less distracted, at least) with a typewriter. Typewriters don't have email to check or news to read or blogs to write in...

Back to work!

Job Description

If I were to describe my job on a resume, I would say something like this

Served as a research assistant to collaborate on public health research investigating race disparities in factors associated with HPV vaccination behaviors. Recruited participants and administered questionnaires in English and Spanish.

When people I meet down here ask what I'm doing in Des Moines, I usually tell them I'm working on a research project at DMU and that I sit in a clinic waiting room all day and ask people to fill out a survey. Most nod their heads smugly and are secretly glad that they don't have to do that kind of work. Sitting in a clinic waiting room all day sounds boring, and asking strangers to take a survey just sounds uncomfortable.

Though the job sounds one-dimensional at first glance, there are many things I've learned and many skills I have garnered that will be valuable lessons in organization, collaboration, communication and extroversion which are hard to summarize in a succinct resume format.

Doing this work last year, I often felt like a predator preying on unsuspecting patients with the selfish motive of being one participant closer to the final goal of 300 and having a vast library of intimate facts about people. I cannot say why, but this year, I have felt much more comfortable pitching my spiel to people and not feeling guilty about it. I suppose that, after reading the manuscript that resulted from our work last year, I have more confidence in the potential benefits and fruits of our work.

Another aspect of the job that was significantly more difficult last summer was communicating effectively with Spanish-speakers. A combination of cultural knowledge and language skills that I have picked up in the last year have made all the difference in the world in getting the message across to Latinos and also answering questions and quelling concerns associated with sharing sensitive information. At this point last year, I had been exposed to Spanish primarily through classes - readings and lectures. A lot of one-way communication: it's either going in or coming out. The interchange of conversation was severely limited.

Since then, my exposure to Spanish has drastically changed. I spent three months in Costa Rica where both my listening and speaking saw noticeable improvements. I have made Spanish-speaking friends at home and at school. I have been more intentional about seeking out opportunities to speak and listen - namely in conversation tables. All this exposure over the course of the last ten months in addition to my continued classwork in Spanish has made me a much more effective communicator in participant recruitment this summer. It's encouraging to observe this noticeable change.

Perhaps the most valuable lesson from this work has been in the art of not making assumptions. The selection criteria have been young people (ages 15 to 30) and people who self-identify as either White or Latino. I have approached people who have been 50, but could be mistaken for late-20s, and I have approached people who have been 13, but could be mistaken for late teens. The racial determinations are also quite tricky. Turns out that Southeast Asians can easily be mistaken for Latinos. Lesson learned: don't trust your perception of someone's appearance. Better to ask than assume, and so long as you don't make assumptions, there's no reason to feel ashamed at making the wrong call.

Reality Check

God bless my new friend, a veterinarian from Barcelona who recently moved to Minneapolis and has traveled twice to Des Moines in the last month for work. Three weeks ago, he was in town with two colleagues working at Des Moines' World Pork Expo. They were looking for people who spoke both Spanish and English to help translate for them while they were at the fair, and they solicited our Spanish conversation group for volunteers. I was unable to help them at the fair, but we arranged to go out for food and drink later that week. I had a great time and got a lot of practice! My friend had an early meeting in Ames and called to see if I could go out for a drink. We have spoken mostly in Spanish, which is more for my sake than anything. But I do not garner praise for my superior Spanish-speaking abilities from this new friend (nor did I do so with his colleagues when they were here three weeks ago). The reality is I have reached a new level in my abilities. I can keep up with a conversation more often than not, and I can express myself in words in an increasing array of circumstances. However, I am far from possessing a seamless ability to communicate effectively in Spanish. I still have an accent that he says sounds very bad. He can understand what I'm trying to say, but he can very clearly tell that I'm not a native speaker. This is good for me. As I become more confident as I progress, it's important to be aware of where I really stand on the spectrum of abilities. I am much better than I was a year ago, but there is still plenty of room for improvement.

Nostalgia

The past few days, I've been hit by a wave of nostalgia for Costa Rica. Images and memories keep popping into my head...

Eating sweet bread with cream cheese and jam for breakfast at Las Cruces with the tangiest, freshest orange juice I've ever had and fresh pineapple... every morning. Scrambled eggs or bacon were a rare treat. We would eat outside on the deck overlooking the wilderness of the field station, serenaded by toucans and spotting them flying tree to tree if we looked closely enough. We so consistently found ourselves living in such paradaisacal surroundings that it was hard not to take it for granted after a month or so because it became so normal.

I also remember fondly riding into San Vito (or to a finca or La Casona or misa on Sundays) from the station in the back of the 4x4. Especially in the mornings, the bumpy ride on the nauseatingly curvy mountain roads was so beautiful. The landscape was something I was never able to fully capture photographically, but man did I appreciate it in person.

Experiencing the nation's enthusiasm for soccer. Seeing 'S Lugar in San Vito packed to the gills for Costa Rica's last chance at World Cup qualification and sitting at a table with Jorge and Hector and learning all sorts of new swear words in Spanish from Jorge's rambunctious cheering. Walking with a tray full of food through the food court at Mall San Pedro when all of the sudden, the entire place erupted in cheers. (The U20 nationals scored a goal in the U20 World Cup.) Eating breakfast at a soda and watching the U20's lose the third place game in a shoot out. Had they been from the U.S. and choked like that in a shoot out, they would have been harshly criticized if anyone had even cared in the first place, but days later, upon the team's return home, the team bus was greeted in the Centro with thousands of loyal and cheering fans proud of how the young team represented the country in Egypt. Not to mention just being able to jump in on pick up games. Pura vida :)

Not being surprised nor frightened when large insects showed up around the house... in the bedroom... in the shower...

There are plenty of things that I love and appreciate about the midwest (and it will always be home), but it's nice to look back and remember the things that make other, very different places beautiful too.

Magic Hour

magic hour n. a term used by a photographer i know when the sun begins to set. objects are simultaneously illuminated and cast in shadow, and just about everything becomes beautiful. even the seedy side of des moines.

i was driving home from a Bible study of sorts at Trinity Methodist this evening and was impressed by how the light hit many ordinary objects in a part of town that would not be considered beautiful. numerous houses in disrepair and an old school bus that may or may not have had an engine inside become more than just that during magic hour. they take on character and depth when the light illuminates and casts shadows on these objects at the same time. maybe because the juxtaposition of light and dark gives us a sense that we're seeing a more truthful depiction of the object as a whole. with unappealing as well as redeeming qualities.

discussion at the Bible study centered around the story of creation. we listened to some commentary of biblical scholars on contradictions between the two tellings of the creation story in Genesis and how these stories are interpreted by different parts of the church. we talked about creation stories from different societies and cultures and how they are a reflection of the value system of each society. the discussion was very open and comfortable. i did not feel that i had to restrain my true thoughts for fear of being labeled lost and heretical, which has been a common feeling in past discussions in a religious setting. we talked about what the story implies for our stewardship of the earth, and that although we have hope that our ultimate destiny is beyond this earth, that does not curtail the importance of doing good work with the time we have in this life.

in other news, Mexico beat France in the World Cup today and looked very impressive! they're next game against Uruguay should be the most challenging of all.

World Cup 2010

The FIFA World Cup is in full swing, and I am lucky enough to have a summer job that allows me watch the daytime games once in a while. I have been disappointed with a large number of ties so far in the group play, but I have faith that the dominant teams will emerge as we set into the second round of group games.

Though you can easily find team groupings on FIFA.com and I am not an expert on who's who in international soccer, here is who I anticipate (hope) to emerge from group play for the second stage based on the first round of games:

Group A
South Africa
*Mexico
*Uruguay
France

Group B
*Argentina
Nigeria
*Korea Republic
Greece

Group C
*England
*USA
Algeria
Slovenia

Group D
*Germany
Australia
Serbia
*Ghana

Group E
*Netherlands
Denmark
*Japan
Cameroon

Group F
*Italy
*Paraguay
New Zealand
Slovakia

Group G
*Brazil
Korea DPR
*Cote d'Ivoire
Portugal

Group H - I think this group will be the most interesting to watch.
*Spain
Switzerland
Honduras
*Chile

Gender Roles and Culture

I just finished a book called In the Land of God and Man by Silvana Paternostro, which is reviewed here. This book takes a harsh look at the sexual culture of Latin America and the harm that the values of machismo have inflicted and continue to inflict on the female population.

She writes of a permissiveness of reckless sexual behavior among men in the name of being manly that is matched only by a fierce double standard that women be imitators of the Virgin Mary, saving themselves for the only man with whom they'll ever be intimate, who also never paid a thought to saving himself for her.

I read nearly the entire book last week while working in the clinic recruiting participants to our HPV study, and the timing is coincidental because one of our target populations for our study on a sexually transmitted infection is Latino men and women.

While I read, I had to keep an eye on patients entering the waiting room so that I could approach them if they appeared to fit our recruitment criteria, and as I lifted my eyes occasionally from my page, I wondered to myself if these harsh indictments apply to the Latino men sitting in my midst.

Some of the author's stories angered me to the point of wanting to jump out of my chair and stomp my feet on the ground in frustration.

This information was not entirely new to me either. As part of our training as research assistants last summer, we sat down with a Latina woman who led a domestic abuse support group for Latina women in Des Moines and talked through some of the cultural barriers we may encounter in the data collection process. We also attended one of their meetings for participant recruitment. Regardless, I think receiving that information from multiple sources almost makes it more upsetting because then it takes on an air of commonality, like its a normal thing that's just a part of life. Some of the things these women go through should in no way be acceptable or accepted.

Entonces, [stepping off my soapbox] issues of gender roles in Latino culture have been called blaringly to my attention, and I wonder if our data will reveal any of these patterns as well. I also wonder what role these issues may play in my future work, whether it be direct, as in a specific focus of my career or more indirect, as simple reality of which I need to be acutely aware when working with Latino people.

With that in mind, I just stumbled across a website for and organization called Casa de Esperanza which is based in St. Paul and devotes itself to just these kinds of issues. Good people doing good work :)

What a Good Day Looks Like

Today was a good day. Not extraordinarily good, just good. The sun was out and the temperature was not too oppressive. I assembled an outfit in which I was comfortable and felt confident, with a dress my mom bought me a couple weeks ago at Filene's Basement in Boston. An old friend that I hadn't seen in nearly a year went out of his way to buy me lunch and we enjoyed our sandwiches, each other's company and the pleasant weather on the patio. When I returned to work, I had the opportunity for another free lunch that the Merck representatives brought to the clinic - taco bar! They also promised to hook us up with HPV and Gardasil® materials to distribute to curious study participants. We managed to recruit a decent number of participants to the study today, but I also had ample time to read. This may be the only job I ever have in which I get paid a decent hourly wage to read for pleasure (and perform my duties when duty calls, of course). After work, I went to a fitness class with my boss, who is also seven months pregnant. She called me out on less-than-stellar wall-sit form. My legs are gloriously sore from lots of squatting. I haven't been extrinsically challenged (coach, instructor, etc. telling me to get lower, work harder, run faster) since I quit playing competitive soccer two and a half years ago. Glad to know I can still hack it. For dinner, I whipped up a very sophisticated batch of macaroni and cheese (the sophistication being limited to using lowfat yogurt with the cheese mix instead of butter and milk - tangy and healthy) and paired it with a spinach salad, an apple and a glass of water. After dinner, I conversed with other Spanish-speakers for two hours. Met some new and interesting folks and reacquainted myself with a couple familiar faces. I also got an invitation to a bilingual church service at a nearby Methodist church... just what I've been looking for! I am also plotting my first encounter with the Des Moines salsa scene sometime in the next week.

Coming soon this weekend: World Cup games! a bike ride? Farmer's market depending on how exciting the soccer games are... some focused time with my biocomm paper.

In the land of corn...

I have many friends who have studied abroad over the course of the last couple years. Many of these people have set up blogs with the express purpose of reporting back to loved ones from far off places, and in many cases, these sites get abandoned after the students return stateside. I have followed suit with that pattern... until now. I have decided that amaneciendo bien is not an attitude or a mantra that is limited to the land of pura vida. Blogging is certainly a worthwhile venture, both to share my thoughts with others (although, eight months between updates, there aren't many that check this site anymore) and to arrange digest my thoughts in order to express them. So here I go, resurrecting this blog, documenting life's happenings beyond my experiences abroad.

At this moment, I am sitting on the living room couch at my summer residence in Des Moines, IA. Sara and the dog just got home from a romp in the park. Both the air conditioner and the TV are on, and I have plans to heat up leftover macaroni and cheese before I head to Spanish conversation table in a couple minutes.

The last couple weeks have been somewhat of a blur. Three weeks ago, I was simultaneously studying for final exams and packing up my life (again) to move out of my apartment in Morris. A mere thirty six hours after moving out, I hopped an early plane to Boston to spend with my mother while she is receiving treatment at Massachussetts General Hospital. We had a great week together, seeing the sites, pretending to talk like Bostonians and riding the train. It was a good way to kick off the summer. After a week in Boston, I returned home to help my dad hold down the fort for a week and preparing to spend my summer in Des Moines. We planted the garden for mom, while tending all the things she normally takes care of in addition to our normal responsibilities. My father has a lot on his plate taking care of the house solo.

Then I got things packed into the car to move down to Des Moines.

Being back in Des Moines is great so far. My living situation is very comfortable and enjoyable, and I am excited to be working on another HPV study. I find that after my experiences in Costa Rica, my Spanish has improved to an extent that makes communicating with Latinos in the clinics much less stressful and much more enjoyable. In the past months, I have taken great joy in any opportunity to use Spanish, and hearing it on the streets anywhere still brings a smile to my face.

Also, in my new location, I find myself in the center of a fabulous network of biking trails that I only had scarce access to last summer. There is much more to discover and enjoy on my bike this year.

Here's to a good summer... to be continued :)