Beholden

Life is moving so quickly forward. The year 2011 (or the first six months of it) has been marked by so many good things. So many blessings. Since January I have been picking up momentum, preparing to move on, ready for new, grand adventures. Dwelling in the present has been a challenge. As plans for the next two years of my life have materialized out of (what seems to be) thin air, it is difficult to not get caught up in that excitement. But really, I wish I could dwell in these experiences for longer than the time allotted.

I am in Holden Village for five weeks this summer, but I feel like I could easily spend a year here. This place fosters good living. Based around three solid, but modest meals a day, I'm expected to work, but also to rest. I dwell in community and meet new people everyday, but also have time and space to seek solitude. I know this is pretty cushy compared to living in the real world, but it feels good to be earning my keep. I earn my meals and my bed, and I make the most of my leisure time.

I couldn't tell you what my expectations were for my partial summer here. I abstractly anticipated meeting new and interesting people, taking in the physical landscape and being able to spend plenty of time reading and reflecting both on what's behind me and before me. I cannot say that any of those expectations haven't been satisfied, but the experience as a whole is different than I imagined it.

Arriving in the Village as a stranger, my first week here was less comfortable than my first week abroad. When traveling abroad, my peers were all strangers but we all came in on a level playing field. All of us had little idea of what to expect from the experience and were diving headlong into a grand adventure together as peers. That experience is the closest likeness to what my arrival in the Village was like, but the discomfort was more extreme. Here, I entered a working system that the folks that greeted me off the bus all had a role in, socially and logistically. I was at a disadvantage having been new to the entire scenario, and getting settled here felt like a more daunting process than adjusting to the culture of a different country. Maybe that's a testament to the strength of Holden culture: how it changes people. Regardless, I become more comfortable with each passing day and after nine days, feel like I am beginning to thrive in my new environment.